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Wednesday, May 11, 2016

I am highly distressed and confused



My story is closely related to the recent post that reads "married to an impossible man" only that am not married to my supposed fiance yet. My boyfriends name is Meshack and we have known each other for over 10years but we just started to date barely 8months now. I have never really seen him as potential soul mate cos of his wild lifestyle.


Hence, the reason for the long non-committed relationship. As time went by and he grew more mature, I decided to say yes to his proposal. I came to like everything about him and as fate would have it, we have almost everything in common. He claims he has always loved me and even when I kept rejecting him he kept praying that one day I would be his.

I'm almost tempted to disbelieve the authenticity of that statement cos he is not scared one bit to lose me as I write this. I hurt, he doesn't, I text he ignores and sees nothing wrong with it. The best time we get on well is when we talk dirty and naughty things. He even freaks out sometimes when I don't respond to it.
He could go a day without trying to reach me on the phone or via social medium and when I eventually reach out to him he would say he was just about to call. He wouldn't let me know what he's busy with or what he's up to but I know he does no illegal thing maybe he's shy to tell me or he feels I don't deserve to know, I couldn't really tell.
I know he's got a financial situation but I Never turned my back on him when I find out I still continue to love him but he's far from being honest with me. He's in Abuja while am in Lagos. We never used to have any problem with the distance until now. I have been sounding it to his hearing that we should talk but he's just passive about it.

I would believe i call more, cos i spend fortunes in reaching out to him but I don't get even half of the same gesture in return. How can my boyfriend who claims he's in a serious relationship with me not know when am hurting or what to do when am hurting. Sometimes, I just think he's punishing me for the long years I refused to date him.
When I think about him in one way, am convinced he's the one for me but when i think of him in another, I begin to question myself and what am still doing with him. I'm very hasty in making decisions about what I want and otherwise but I must say that right now the decision to quit him and what I feel for him is almost impossible for me.

I'm so disturbed and distressed now that its affecting my spiritual life and relationship with other guys cos am filled with so much disgust. But asides all these, Meshack is a very sweet lover, and also mature-minded. I actually said yes to him at a time I was avoiding men and their issues but he gently won my heart with his sweetness.


Please, help me to decide as I'm tired of holding on even though I know its difficult to let go.

Thanks






3 comments:

  1. Honey he's cheating on your ass. Play the same game

    ReplyDelete
  2. U gurls ar all same... Always falling for the sweetest guy. Sis advice ursef

    ReplyDelete

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